cw: pain
as i sit here and contemplate the feeling of these pseudo-frissons and how they differ from actual nerve feedback, the only conclusion that i can draw is that i am not experiencing the corresponding stimuli that would normally be necessary for them to be produced. that disconnect has me instinctively rejecting them as "pain", and the hurdle here is my own brain's categorization of the input. so i think i am starting to "get" what needs to happen for me to move past these feelings.